Choosing Joy Revisited

Fun Fact: I have believed for many years now that May is the middle of the year. I told D the other day- can you believe we are already halfway through 2016? His reply: “You know that July 1st is technically the halfway mark, right?” And then we both burst into laughter…

Either way, I cannot believe it is May! Like usual, time flies.

I have been wanting to write for awhile. It has been since February. But, I simply did not know what to write about. Truthfully, this has been a hard few months. There have been a lot of changes in our lives. Moving has brought up a gamut of issues I thought I had under “control.” Anxiety and perfectionism have once again reared their ugly heads. While I’m grateful to wrestle with these things yet again because I know it means the Lord is still healing things in me, the depths of the struggles have been deeper than they have ever been.

One week in particular, the darkness seemed to persist. I had anxiety in ways I have not experienced before. My face literally turned numb. When we went to have it evaluated, their diagnosis was stress and anxiety. My body was physically displaying issues that were going on internally. After doing some research and talking to a family Dr, he told us that yes, this did sound like stress and that Vitamin B levels dropping could also contribute to this. He recommended some supplements which I took faithfully (thanks to my family and D reminding me!) and the weight has slowly begun to be lifted.

First, let me say- if you struggle with anxiety, I am so sorry. Truly. It is exhausting in every way. It is hard for others to understand you. It is painful to push through when you have a family to take care of when all you want to do is crawl in bed and sleep. It is frustrating when you do everything you can think of to help ease it and nothing seems to help. As I fought through these moments, I prayed for you. For those that struggle with anxiety and want rest and joy and hope.

Second, through all of this I have been processing many, many things. What does self-love look like? Self-care? I knew that through the trial, I NEEDED to choose joy. I’m not even saying that in a cliche way because its the name of my blog. I knew that the Lord is ALWAYS good. I know that my life is FULL of things to be joyful about.

In a book I’m reading, the Gifts of Imperfection, she quotes another book, The Soul of Money. In this book, she addresses the myth of scarcity.  A concept I have never thought about before but have been consistently thinking on since reading this quote:

“For me, and for many of us, our first waking thought of the day is “I didn’t get enough sleep.” The next one is “I don’t have enough time.” Whether true or not, that thought of not enough occurs to us automatically before we even think to question or examine it. We spend most of the hours and the days of our lives hearing, explaining, complaining, or worrying about what we don’t have enough of…We don’t have exercise. We don’t have enough work. We don’t have enough profits. We don’t have enough power. We don’t have enough wilderness. We don’t have enough weekends. Of course, we don’t have enough money-ever…Before we even sit up in bed, before our feet touch the floor, we’re already inadequate, already behind, already losing, already lacking something. And by the time we go to bed at night, our minds race with a litany of what we didn’t get, or didn’t get done, that day. We go to sleep burdened by these thoughts and wake up to the reverie of lack…What begins as a simple expression of the hurried life, or even the challenged life, grows into the great justification for an unfulfilled life.”

Whoa. This mindset was driving a TON of my anxiety. Truthfully, our circumstances have been trying. There have been things out of our control that have wounded me and D. Other things, however, were driven by this “not enough”mindset. Not enough order. Not enough time. Not enough money. Not enough sleep. So, what does this author suggest?

“We each have the choice in any setting to step back and let go of the mindset of scarcity. Once we let go…we discover the surprising truth of sufficiency. Sufficiency resides inside of each of us, and we can call it forward. It is a consciousness, an attention, an intentional choosing of the way we think about our circumstances.”

After discussing this concept, the author of the Gifts of Imperfection, delves into how gratitude translates into joy. It is a real, studied concept. She does not tell us to negate what is actually going on. She talks about being real with ourselves and our emotions, but then meeting that with gratitude, allowing this to turn ordinary moments into moments of joy. So, this is what I have been doing. Working to speak out loud (I’ve tried to make lists, but with three children, by the time I get to the pen and paper…it just doesn’t happen) things I am grateful for.

This week:

  • I am deeply grateful for the community of women that surround me. For the encouraging texts of “I’m praying for you!” to checking in on me to watching my children so I can have room to breathe to bringing me meals even when I hesitate to accept to long hugs because you know I need one. Thank you, friends, for loving me well.
  • My sweet, gracious husband. I know at times these past few weeks, he has felt lost, not knowing what I needed. But he fought to love me even when it was not easy. Then, he set up a lunch with a couple we really look up to, knowing that we needed to process with others, and they spoke life into us in ways we did not even know we needed. Which parlays into my next one…
  • Couples that we can turn to and they will speak truth about our situation all while encouraging and praying for us.
  • My sweet, sweet children. They are so gracious with me and bring joy in ways I did not even know they could. They are the epitome of joy- finding pleasures in the ordinary simplicity of life.
  • The Lord’s faithfulness to show me and to teach me and to heal me.

Lastly, if you are still reading, here is what I’ve been clinging to and praying over our family. I hope it can be of encouragement to you as well.

Psalm 2:12: Blessed are those who take refuge in Him.

Luke 1:49: “For He who is Mighty has done GREAT things for me and holy is his name.” 

He HAS and will do great things, and when I can’t see that, I pray I would take refuge in Him, CHOOSING JOY and thankfulness for what is right in front of me.

Choosing Joy Revisited

Thoughts on Hospitality

A book I stumbled upon recently, Mudhouse Sabbath: An Invitation to a Life of Spiritual Discipline, is a memoir written by Lauren Winner that details what she has learned from the “traditions and spiritual practices of Judaism.” Winner became a Christian later on there life and she explains how Christians could learn from some of the Jewish practices. She looks at concepts such as sabbath, mourning, fasting, and candle lighting.

The chapter that struck me the most was her chapter on hospitality. She talks about how important hospitality is to the Jewish faith. Because they were once “strangers in the land of Egypt,” Jewish communities take inviting people into their homes seriously. In the words of one rabbi, “everything God created is a manifestation of His kindness. The world is one big hospitality inn.” Not only does God’s creation encourage us to invite people into our homes because He created our homes, but as Christians we also believe in the Trinity. The Trinity causes us to not only invite people into our homes, but into our lives because we were created to be in relationship just as God is in relationship with Jesus and the Holy Spirit.

Here are her words that have had my brain spinning for the past few weeks:

“We are not meant simply to invite people into our homes, but also invite them into our lives. Having guests and visitors, if we do it right, is not an imposition, because we are not meant to rearrange our lives for our guests- we are meant to invite our guests to enter into our lives as they are. It is this forging of relationships that transforms entertaining (i.e. deadly dull cocktail parties at the country club) into hospitality (i.e. a simple pizza on my floor). As writer Karen Burton Mains puts it, “Visitors may be more than guests in our home. If they like, they may be friends.” …. At its core, I think, cultivating an intimacy in which people can know and be known requires being honest- practicing the other Christian discipline of telling the truth about where we live and how we got there. Often, I’d rather just dissemble. Often, just as I’d rather welcome guests into a cozy and cute apartment worthy of Southern Living, I’d rather show them a Lauren who is perfect and put-together and serene.”

For some reason, these words have pushed me to let go of my perfectionism when it comes to my home. Yes, I want it to be cozy and yes, I want it to be orderly. But, I do not need to sweat it when people drop by or when they come over on an “off” day and my house is not exactly the way I’d like it to be. Because like Winner is talking about, I don’t want to just invite people into my home and portray a life that isn’t my own, I want to invite people into my actual life.

The life where there may be several laundry baskets on my living room floor.

The life where my children may be crabby because they did not get enough sleep or they are just…crabby.

The life where a teething baby needs to be constantly held.

The life where crumbs abound.

The life where I am not put together nor do I have it all together.

The life where I am constantly learning to be more gentle and gracious with those around me.

But the life where Jesus is seen and felt, where peace is seen and felt, where love is seen and felt. Because I know that He has me and I trust what He is doing in my life. Because I am grateful for my home and the mess that it holds. Because I can choose joy for all of the blessings and trials my family has and endures. Because He is good.

This is what I want to invite people into.

It is so freeing to view hospitality in a deeper way. Not a “put together and serene” hospitality, but a nitty gritty, come into my life and let’s walk this journey together hospitality.

Thoughts on Hospitality

Rhythm

Well, I had every intention of writing this post weeks ago, but for some reason, time slips away from me🙂

Each year I pray about a word that is going to define my year. A word that will shape me, a concept that I feel like the Lord wants to work with me on. This year the word that kept coming to mind was rhythm. After each child, things get a little crazy around here. I’m sure you mommas understand. The first three months are pure survival. Feed, eat, change clothes, make sure everyone feels loved, and try to sleep. I knew this would be the case with adding the third child, but the knowledge did not necessarily make it easier for me. Being type A, I desire to have things in order at all times. So, there were a lot of times of surrender and release of perceived control as I just let things happen. I am thankful that the Lord has really worked on me in this area. Children certainly do teach us how to sacrifice and work towards being selfless.

All this to say, I felt like it was time for us to reestablish what a rhythm would look like for us this year. Some of the main rhythms I wanted to work towards were:

-Morning Rhythm

-Evening Rhythm

-Weekly Rhythms

-Rhythms of being diligent with drinking water and taking our herbs

-Quiet Time Rhythms

-Serving Together as a Family Rhythm

-Cleaning Rhythms

-Rhythms of Rest

-Grocery Shopping Rhythms

To me, the process of streamlining our home meant that we are able to function in a healthier way and to better steward our resources.

The first area I felt we needed to tackle was our morning and evening rhythms. Over the summer we let go of bedtimes and it really began to affect the dynamic of our evenings. Sleep was not happening! And the mornings were just chaotic as each child woke up at different times and I felt like I could never keep up once the morning got away from me. So, I made these handy sheets to hang on the girls door. Though they are not perfect and we have had to adjust already, they are loving them! They love to read what comes next and have started to know what the rhythm is without referencing them.

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We have seen HUGE growth in our evenings. Each night we have worked to be more intentional with settling down and easing into bedtime rather than just hurriedly throwing them in our beds which is what we are used to doing. So, we have been making Chamomile Tea, eating toast and butter (load them up with good fats), reading a story by candlelight, praying, blowing the candle out, and going to bed. Falling asleep is not taking nearly as long and they are staying in their bed for the most part. It’s been wonderful for all parties. Not every night is perfect, but we have definitely seen a positive change in our girls with the rhythm being enacted.

I think that has been the most beneficial part of this for me: seeing what works for our family and then seeing our girls thrive. They are high energy girls who need lots of time to wind down, and instead of meeting those needs before, we grew frustrated and exasperated. It has brought me joy to support them in the ways that they desire but cannot necessarily express.

Mornings have become easier as well. The biggest change in mindset for me was having granola or trail mix for them to snack on before I can get to making breakfast. They typically wake up at separate times and I was feeling exhausted trying to keep up with each of them and myself and not wanting to cook breakfast until everyone was awake but continually hearing “I’m hungry!” This has worked well in curbing their appetite until I have it together enough to cook breakfast.

Another chart I made was for my cleaning routine and drinking water! Clean Mama is a great resource for printables for this area. This rhythm is not coming naturally yet, but I am thankful to have a platform to work from.

 

I am truly excited for growth in our rhythms this year. What rhythms do you have that works for you?

Rhythm

A Look Back at 2015

The past week or so I have been reflecting on 2015 and all the lessons it has brought. This year flew by! It is hard to remember all that has happened. We have gone through more business changes, added a child to our family, changed cars, endured trials, celebrated with joy, grown in the Lord, and loved time together as a family. I could not be more in love with D and with my girls. What a blessing!  I’m extremely thankful for all the Lord has done, both in teaching us through trials and in successes. As I look back, I wanted to document the three most impactful lessons I learned this year.

  1. This year I believe the Lord placed on my heart the word intentional. I hope that I have grown in this area- striving to be purposeful in my parenting, friendships, and in interacting with the world around me. Intentionality showed up in many ways and I am thankful for the ways I was stretched in this area. One of the biggest lessons I learned this year though was learning my limits. Having H was one of the greatest joys of my year, but her birth also caused me to learn my personality and how much I could handle at one time. Naturally I crave order and quiet. Three children have definitely challenged me in this way! So, I have had to learn how to say no, or to plan out my weeks in more purposeful ways. This has played out by only doing one playdate per week or by saying no to parties/brunches/coffeedates that I used to say yes to or by really calculating if an investment is wise. I have had to learn to balance this lesson with still stretching myself to serve all while knowing that saying “no” really does benefit me and my family. Along with this lesson would be letting my yes be yes. (Matthew 5:37). One of the ways my husband has challenged me the most is by teaching me what commitment looks like. If he commits to something he is ALL in and it’s because he takes what Jesus says seriously even on a small scale. Before we started dating I was used to canceling on people just because I wanted to, calling off work, etc. He has really taught me that if I say yes to something, then I need to follow through unless it is for a valid reason (sick kid typically!). This has changed and morphed as I learn to balance motherhood with three kiddos but I am thankful for the lesson in saying no, but when you do say yes, commit with your whole heart!
  2. Another great lesson I learned this year (and am still learning!) is what it looks like to walk in trust with the Lord. This year brought some really dark days and weeks for me as I got caught up in the news and what was happening in the world around me. I allowed current events to dictate my moods and beliefs and it was not healthy. Through this process, I am beyond grateful for one of my best friends who literally walked me through this trial day by day, checking in to see how I was doing and what I had chosen to set my sights on that day. She taught me how to declare truth even if it took minute by minute of saying “Lord, I trust you.” She also taught me what true friendship looks like- how to be a friend and love people in their weaknesses. She could have easily been annoyed by my constant questions and prayer requests, but she stuck with me, choosing to show me Jesus. I am still in the learning stages of being intentional about what I allow into my mind and heart and choosing to not let fear grip my heart. But, I can stand knowing that God is good, God cares, and God tells me not to fear, so I will choose to walk each step trusting Him.
  3. The last lesson has been a fresh one for me. Gentleness. “Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near.” Phil 4:5 My natural proclivity is not to be gentle with my children when things get crazy. When the sink is full of water and the bathroom is soaked. When food gets thrown. When we just woke up and they are already fighting over baby dolls. When they will not sleep….again. When they are loud. I love my girls with all that I have and they are a source of my greatest joy, but when these events happen, I have noticed that I have a hard time responding with gentleness. This verse is not just for interacting with other adults. I think we often forget that children are people too. They are a part of the “all.” If anyone needs to be treated with gentleness, it is probably them. They are moldable and I am imitatable. I want to provide them with a secure home and the tools they need to learn how to live this verse out in their own lives. I desire for them to treat others around them with gentleness- in word and in deed- because it is what they experience at home. I am praying that the Lord continues to give me tools and resources and strength and patience to allow this to play out in our daily lives. Also, if you are around me and my girls and you treat them with gentleness even in their worst moments, you encourage me to the depths of my heart and teach me what it looks like to love gently. I am so thankful for those of you that have done this and in turn spurred me on to do the same.

2015 has been great! These lessons were not always easy and I have failed in many ways, but I am grateful that His love never fails and that He will continue to work on me as my family enters 2016. Happy New Year!!

A Look Back at 2015

Teach Me To Number My Days

It has been over a month now since baby H entered the world. She is a precious gift.

From the moment I saw her, I have wanted to bottle her up and keep her in this stage where she sleeps on my chest forever. The newborn phase definitely is not easy, but I love the snuggles immensely. This desire is magnified when I look at sweet M, who is now three and a half. Time flies and #allthehormones have been contributing to me being super emotional about this.

As I was indulging in some much needed alone time (with baby H) at one of my newest favorite coffee shops, I came across this passage:

“Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” Psalm 90:12

A heavy “yes” was all I could say.

“Yes, Lord, please teach me.”

And oh am I thankful He is faithful!

Each day I seem to be reminded of the fast pace of life when I look at each of my children. I love each season that I am experiencing with them. But, at the same time, I get stuck mentally. The usual issues I write about so frequently on here- my house is not clean enough, my schedule is too chaotic, I have very little alone time,  etc. All issues that can be valid but most of the time are bred in selfishness and perfectionism.

As I have been dwelling on this verse, I am not only convicted to sit down and actually enjoy this season that I am in- because I do not want to miss it- but I am also calling into question what is actually important.

How do I want to invest these numbered days? 

What really matters?

How am I impacting the kingdom today?

Because the Lord has been faithful to remind me of this verse and to begin working a heart of wisdom, I have tried to begin to create memory markers.

When I am tickling MK and she is laughing so hard I can see all of her teeth- “Lord, help me to remember this moment.”

When M says “Mom, I think I can do this. I think I’m gonna be just fine” before she starts her first solo gymnastics class and yet still wants to cuddle up in my lap every night as we sing the lullaby we made up- “Lord, help me to cherish this moment. Don’t let me forget it.”

When H gives me the biggest toothy grin and when I smell the top of her head as I carry her- “Lord, please engrain this in my memory.”

I am praying that this intentionality allows me to reflect on these moments five years down the road.

I don’t want to miss out because I’m distracted.

I want to love fully and live well and with a heart of wisdom.

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Teach Me To Number My Days

And Then There Were Five…

We have made it to week one! The girls, daddy, and I are all enjoying baby HJ or “baby Joy” as MK calls her. She is such a good baby and we are adjusting well to our new routine. Babies are so precious and I am trying to soak up every moment that I can.

For those who are interested, here is our birth story. I love recollecting what happened and reflecting on the beauty of a life being born!

The last month of pregnancy was SO hard for me this time around. Not physically, but mentally. I was ready to meet this little babe! And even though I have never delivered significantly early before, there was always that hope that maybe this time I would. Well, that did not happen! I was two days late🙂

At my last appointment with my midwife, she told me that I was 2 cm dialated and that it could be sometime that week. We made an appointment for the next week, however, to discuss induction if need be. I was wrestling with hopefulness and anxiety as I really did not want to be induced. She encouraged me to get on my hands and knees a lot to help the baby get into the right position. So, that is what I did! When my girls were napping that day, I got out my soapy water and sponges, cleared out all the furniture from the kitchen, and scrubbed that floor on all fours. I got some Braxton Hicks contractions that night, but still nothing too strong or close together.

The next morning, I decided to scrub all my baseboards! Nesting and prepping for labor all in one. I started to feel actual contractions, but they were twenty to thirty minutes apart. Again, nothing timeable. But, since they were radiating from my back, I knew labor was on its way. I took the girls to the park where we walked and explored. Still… only twenty minutes apart. When Dan got home, he said he knew it would be that night and that we needed to get to walking!

This is always fun for us. With every birth, we have walked the mall in hopes to get things moving and the next day we have had our babies! So, we dropped the girls off at grandmas, and began walking. We did a few laps around the mall, and the contractions began moving to every 15 minutes! My back began to hurt, so we picked up the girls, and dropped them off at my mom’s house just in case baby decided to come that evening.

Good thing we did! Around midnight, the contractions began picking up in intensity and were every 10-15 minutes apart. Even though they were not any closer, they were stronger and I was not able to sleep. Around 4 AM, I woke D up and said I think it’s time to go! We did not want to push it because with MK, I showed up at the hospital and was already 8 cm.

Funny part of the story: Before he went to bed, D told me, “I do not want you to push this. We need to go in sooner rather than later. Promise me you won’t push it.” I agreed and we said good night. Then, when I woke him up, I went out to the couch to work through another contraction. I go back into the bedroom to find him back to sleep!  :) I woke him up again and off we went!

When we arrived at the hospital I was at 5 cm and because my last labor progressed so quickly they decided to admit me. I was so excited because it meant baby was coming and because my midwife happened to be on call that day! She has delivered all of our babies, so I was praising God for His timing. Also, my sister was leaving for Haiti in two days, and I was thankful she would be able to meet baby girl.

We headed to the birthing room where we waited for things to progress. I sat on the birthing ball for a while, sat in the tub, and worked through some contractions standing up.

My midwife checked me again at about 9:45 and I was at 8 cm. We decided to break my water to get things moving. She discovered that the baby had pooped in the womb which was funny to us because M had done the same thing! This just meant that when baby was born, a team of nurses would be standing by to make sure she did not aspirate.

At this point, I was pretty tired and hungry and was surprised that this labor was taking much longer than my last one! Mentally it began to be a battle for me. I tried to let go of the fear of what was to come and the anxiety of wanting things to move faster than they were. Thankfully, at this point, the contractions were still not too intense and I was able to close my eyes and rest in between them.

After awhile, we decided to try some different positions to get baby to drop into position. I had only progressed to a 9 and things seemed to be stuck. My back labor was the most intense I had ever experienced which started to become very challenging for me. The most comfortable position I found was standing up while holding onto the bed and my sweet husband stood there and would give me counter pressure while working through a contraction and then would massage my back as I rested. He is such a blessing to me!

Eventually my midwife had me lay on my side and this is where everything seemed to change! I worked through one contraction this way and it was by far the most painful one! This is where we think the baby turned and dropped. I quickly returned to standing after this. My midwife asked me if I would like to deliver standing up, and at this point I did not want to move, so I said yes. About ten minutes later, baby girl was born! This was the coolest part of my labor. I’m thankful for the way God designed our bodies and that I was given the freedom to do what felt best at that stage. I am grateful for our midwife and how she has graciously walked us through each of our labors! (And dealt with all of my “I can’t do this! comments:) )

D and I thoroughly enjoyed those first few hours just loving on and snuggling with our baby. I love those special, private moments we get to enjoy getting to know the newest member of our family. Truth be told, we were pretty exhausted from not having slept and were also looking forward to eating and a nap!

We enjoyed every moment in that hospital. We received wonderful care from the greatest nurses, we enjoyed many cups of Starbucks coffee and the delicious treats our visitors brought us, and we cherished snuggling with our baby while resting and enjoying each other’s company before we entered the joyful chaos of life with three.

We are both so thankful for everyone that played with and watched M and MK, brought us meals, and prayed for us during our pregnancy and labor. We are so blessed to be surrounded by the community God has given us.

Children are a gift from the LORD; they are a reward from him. Psalm 127:3

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You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body
    and knit me together in my mother’s womb.
Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!
    Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.

You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion,
    as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.
You saw me before I was born.
    Every day of my life was recorded in your book.
Every moment was laid out
    before a single day had passed.

 How precious are your thoughts about me,[b] O God.
    They cannot be numbered!

Psalm 139: 13-17

And Then There Were Five…

Full Term- Almost There!

I can’t believe the last post I wrote was in May! How is it almost July already?

The anticipation for summer always feels like forever and then somehow those three summer months fly by.

We are loving being outside. There have been many days spent in some form of water whether it is a pool or a sprinkler and several days spent at the park. I adore watching the girls have the freedom to run and selfishly I also like that the less time we spend in the house, the less messy it is😉

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Despite the happiness that comes from being in the sunshine, I have wrestled lately with choosing joy in one large area of this season of my life – pregnancy.

This past week I have just felt done. I was focused on my large belly and the exhaustion that it brings, both physically and emotionally. I wrestled with body image issues. I concentrated on every little pain, hoping that it was labor. When it wasn’t, I had to fight discouragement. I nested like crazy. My hormones manifested themselves in the way of tears and an attitude of being on edge. In short, I was not very easy to live with.

I am so grateful for my husband’s response. He finally said to me, ” I am not surprised by what is going on here. You need to have a baby.” He is so gracious with me especially when I am undeserving!

Thankfully, the Lord has gripped my heart once again and reminded me that there is joy to be found NOW. Not just when my five senses would be activated by holding a newborn, but now. In the present.

Here are some areas He has helped me to choose joy in:

Joy in the beauty of growing a baby. Seriously, how crazy is it that the Lord has chosen women’s bodies to grow another life! Every time I feel her move I am in awe that there is a real, live person inside of me! I do not need to look at my body with contempt (although I need to continue to make healthy choices), but rather with a spirit of thankfulness that the Lord is knitting something together in my womb. Right now.

Joy in sleep. Right now both of my girls take about a two hour nap at the same time every day. This means I get to nap too! At night I generally get to sleep all the way through the night. Most mornings, I find little ones in my bed, but I have no idea how they got there which means I did not have to wake up to soothe them🙂 I am relieved by our current schedule and I am soaking up the sleep I do get right now.

Joy in alone time both with my girls and with D. Every time we have a baby our lives change monumentally, of course, so I want to soak up this seasons without rushing the days by.

Joy in perseverance. I do not want to pretend to know more than the keeper of time, so I am satisfied with continuing to carry this baby even when it’s hard!

Joy in the end. Honestly, I love being pregnant. I have always loved being pregnant. This is the first pregnancy I have wrestled with wanting to be done which is a new emotion for me! It has been good to remind myself of that fact. I am blessed to be pregnant and to carry this child to term. There is so much functionally that develops in a baby these last few weeks, that I am thankful that she is still in my belly, growing and prepping for the real world.

Joy in the Lord. Pregnant or not, I am content because the Lord is good! It sounds so cliche, but I look at the above list and I am pleased that He gently leads my heart. That He reminds me of His goodness and does not desire for me to focus on the negative aspects of life. I am satisfied with where I am because He reminds me of all of these beautiful areas of joy.

What circumstance are you in right now? I challenge you to sit down and ask the Lord to reveal areas of blessing in the midst of discouragement to you, too!

I look forward to meeting this little girl, but until then, we wait, with joy!

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Full Term- Almost There!